Identity Crisis

well. i never thought i'd see the day when i used this phrase. but-

i'm currently feeling so emotionally divided, or in Harry Potter terms, splinched, that i can't even write proper poetry right now. believe me, i've been trying to use poetry as a medium to channel my frustrations. but to no avail.

and i'm so confused right now. i don't recognise myself, and i'm not saying if that's good or bad, but it's REALLY scary.

it's like, i'm not who i used to be, and i'm not what i want to be. there's nothing upon which i can base myself on that is familiar to me, i'm not fitting into any persona that i expected myself to be. and that is what's scaring me the most- i'm not fulfilling my own expectations, so in a way i'm disappointing myself. and i'm terrified and totally averted to disappointment. and i hate it. and that the very thing contributing to it is myself simply confounds me.

what should i do?????



oh, and i can't for the life of me figure out who is viewing this blog all the way from ICELAND. oh, you're on my feedjit, i can see you, yeah, don't deny it... if i know you please say hi, there's nothing like reconnecting with old friends... if i don't, would you mind giving an introduction? especially pertaining as to why you read this blog of mine of all things?